Life has a way of hitting you in the face and waking you up in a huge way

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Life has a way of hitting you in the face and waking you up in a huge way. I am 46 way too young to die. To be told you are actively dying a slow death is horrifying.  It makes you stop and think . But when you stop and think just for a second that death would be a way to finally get peace it is time for changes.

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First my children

Latisha my 29 year old she is a recovering meth addict that has palsy so bad she cant even touch her children with her whole hands, she has no front teeth and she looks very old. My heart aches, My sister thinks her boyfriend is giving her meth that she is not in recovery because he wants her child and he is actually killing her.

Kyle my 28 year old is going through a divorce and is making it so far . I am proud of him for being a great father and loving his children

Kevin my 20 year old has a lot of problems but is working through them and is attending Carl Alert state college I am so proud of him.

Caleb my 19 year old he is smoking pot and living in a diesel with his dad I worry about him also he needs to straighten up and make a great life.

I want my children to get out and make a descent life get away from the people that want you to fail and if they are currently helping you buy drugs or provides them for you they want you to fail. It is time you all take care of yourself and your children. That is not my job anymore you are grown and I am not physically able to do so anymore.

My life I work and I am currently trying for a promotion that now I will not get because of my health issues.  For fun I mess with romance scammers online the military scammers I unfriend. the young scammers I mess with these are young overseas men that think American women  wants younger men it is fun.  I do not intend to send money or pick up any packages for any man. LOL ever.  I really intend to get a life because if this is my fun I obviously do not have a life.

I have met a young online friend that has taught me a lot about life lessons , being positive and grabbing life by the tail he will make some young Indian woman a great husband.  Nitin is a very special man.  He is my morning coffee buddy.  To Nitin find that great love in your life spend time nourishing ad taking care of that love.  Grab life by the tail my friend always live it , enjoy it while you are young.  Think of me while you are living it my friend.

Grab ahold of life catch it while you can it is way too short to be wasted.  To everyone that I have ever told you that you are special to me, I love you, and I care about you know I did then and I still do.

About tabethabeautyreviews

About me well I have recently been pondering what I have on my page is being educated about me who I am. My friends are saying here comes the weird Psychology degree stuff. Well some know my past and some don’t, I have always heard don’t put your mistakes (trash out) for all to see. I have decided if its not out for all to see then how is the younger generation going to learn from the older generations mistakes. First I started running away at 14 to get out of a bad home life was this the smartest thing I have ever done, no what did I learn a many lessons in life , what jobs I wanted and did not want is the biggest one for sure to the guy at the paper tiger lounge in Denver, I am so sorry that I risked your business as a Dum teenage kid. To Kay and Myron Nichols from Aurora thanks for taking in a teenager and getting her out of employment that she had no business in. Thanks Kay for trying to teach that kid that she wasn’t ready in life to be a wife and mother and thanks Myron for eating that no bake jello pie that I messed up so bad on. Second to you young bloggers that read my blog to help me out, I was a teenage high school drop out that got pregnant at 16 to get out of a bad home and ended up jumping from the frying pan into the fire. Remember this no matter what mistakes you have made its never to late to start over. I divorced at age 18 and just kept jumping from one bad marriage to another. It took me till my twenties to get that high school diploma, then I walked into Carl Albert state college and enrolled and with 4 kids and a job I now have an associates from Carl Albert state college in sociology/Psychology and a bachelors in psychology with an emphasis in mental health and I have a master’s of science in psychology from the University of Phoenix. I maintained above at least a 3.27 at all the colleges while raising 4 kids and holding a job down. So it is never too late to change your life. The relationship Mistakes first to the professor at NSU that made it a point to tell me that I didn’t have a big red sign on my back that says if you’re a woman beater come my way that it was because I didn’t stay single long enough that I just kept marrying the same man he just had a different face. Thank you I have remained single now and haven’t dated for 5 years and I know see that you are correct. To Craig the guy that came around since I was 14 until I was 30 I finally grew up to bad that you got tired of waiting I am glad that you finally have your soul mate. Now at 45 am looking at changing my career direction scary but all will work out. Second no friends and co-workers I haven’t went crazy from the stress. I just decided that dealing with the fact that I am getting older and showing it is ok. I still intend to get old gracefully and become that girly, girl. This is about me in all my trash being out there

2 responses »

  1. I’m sure this was a hard post to write. I hope you find everything you are looking for in life. I also hope your children find the same, in a drug free environment. Take care of yourself. 🙂

  2. Deeply personal posts like this one don’t always come off the fingers easily, but they are a part of the healing and dealing process. Wishing the best to you and your family, I hope there will soon be a point in time when all of you are healthy and well.

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