My Birth defect and self esteem


I’ve seen a lot of posts by people who don’t want to wear certain types of clothing, because their scars will be visible. They worry that people will stare at them, or ask questions, or make rude comments, and this saddens me. I have always believed that it is not the looks of a person that matters but what is inside the person. I was lucky enough to have been raised in part by my grandmother a woman of the holiness faith.and was raised to believe you are beautiful the way you are. 

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My birth defect I never realized I had until I was diagnosed at age 45.  I always knew I looked different that I could not have cleavage but never really knew why and it never bothered me. I have a condition called Pectus carinatum, I have a mild form it is also called pigeon chest, is a deformity of the chest characterized by a protrusion of the sternum and ribs.  The mayo clinic states it is an uncommon birth defect in which a child’s breastbone protrudes outward abnormally. Sometimes the deformity isn’t noticeable until after the adolescent growth spurt. This was not as noticeable when I was a DD but after weight loss and barely a B cup this is really noticeable but I believe that the older crowd needs to show the younger generation that birth defects are not the end of the world and if people do not think you are beautiful then they do not belong in your life.

I also carry a huge scar on my right shoulder I have never tried to cover this and never thought about how I looked I believe that scars are never “ugly”, in my opinion. They are beautiful, because they tell a story of the trials we have faced. Whether it is a scratch from a childhood fall or a mark from a scalpel, it is your battle wound to wear with pride, so wear it.

I also realized that after weight loss I look old now this bothers me. I started to wonder why with all my imperfections why does looking old bother me is it the medias view of old or my personal view I took this photo and when I saw it I said no I can’t use that I look old and my 19 year old said you are old. LOL.  To him I am over the hill. I decided to share this because I have decided if I look this way in the photo I look this way to people. I can deal with this.

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 So this post is about liking the way god made you and realize everyone is unique and beautiful and no I do not have a big head but I do not have low self-esteem either.  So if your teenager is dealing with birth defects and there looks let them know not all people notice In my life I have only been asked twice why my chest looks the way it does  and I am age 45. Not everyone notice or says the notice.

About tabethabeautyreviews

About me well I have recently been pondering what I have on my page is being educated about me who I am. My friends are saying here comes the weird Psychology degree stuff. Well some know my past and some don’t, I have always heard don’t put your mistakes (trash out) for all to see. I have decided if its not out for all to see then how is the younger generation going to learn from the older generations mistakes. First I started running away at 14 to get out of a bad home life was this the smartest thing I have ever done, no what did I learn a many lessons in life , what jobs I wanted and did not want is the biggest one for sure to the guy at the paper tiger lounge in Denver, I am so sorry that I risked your business as a Dum teenage kid. To Kay and Myron Nichols from Aurora thanks for taking in a teenager and getting her out of employment that she had no business in. Thanks Kay for trying to teach that kid that she wasn’t ready in life to be a wife and mother and thanks Myron for eating that no bake jello pie that I messed up so bad on. Second to you young bloggers that read my blog to help me out, I was a teenage high school drop out that got pregnant at 16 to get out of a bad home and ended up jumping from the frying pan into the fire. Remember this no matter what mistakes you have made its never to late to start over. I divorced at age 18 and just kept jumping from one bad marriage to another. It took me till my twenties to get that high school diploma, then I walked into Carl Albert state college and enrolled and with 4 kids and a job I now have an associates from Carl Albert state college in sociology/Psychology and a bachelors in psychology with an emphasis in mental health and I have a master’s of science in psychology from the University of Phoenix. I maintained above at least a 3.27 at all the colleges while raising 4 kids and holding a job down. So it is never too late to change your life. The relationship Mistakes first to the professor at NSU that made it a point to tell me that I didn’t have a big red sign on my back that says if you’re a woman beater come my way that it was because I didn’t stay single long enough that I just kept marrying the same man he just had a different face. Thank you I have remained single now and haven’t dated for 5 years and I know see that you are correct. To Craig the guy that came around since I was 14 until I was 30 I finally grew up to bad that you got tired of waiting I am glad that you finally have your soul mate. Now at 45 am looking at changing my career direction scary but all will work out. Second no friends and co-workers I haven’t went crazy from the stress. I just decided that dealing with the fact that I am getting older and showing it is ok. I still intend to get old gracefully and become that girly, girl. This is about me in all my trash being out there

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